Rationality in Relationships

I regret how much I’ve tried to apply rationality and logic to relationships.

For some reason, somewhere along the line in my life, I became almost obsessed with applying a kind of mathematical reasoning to personal things. Not just areas where it makes sense, but relationships, emotional context, and how I understand people. I think it has made relationships harder than they needed to be.

Sometimes I’ve treated things that should have been felt with more patience, or openness as if they needed to be solved. I’ve tried to reason my way through things that probably needed more trust, more grace, or simply more time.

I really wish I could just let go and be more trusting, instead of applying mathematical logic and rationality to relationships. I think some of it probably comes from wanting certainty.

I don’t think I want to stop being thoughtful about relationships. I think it's important, perhaps even required, in certain contexts. I still think there is value in being logical about what matters to me and what kind of relationships I want to have. I also think exposure to this kind of thinking can help others define their own boundaries and values by noticing inconsistencies or illogic.

But I regret letting that become the main lens.